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Ceremony Text

Our Wedding Ceremony

Here is the text of our wedding ceremony. We wrote it ourselves so we could enjoy the wedding we actually wanted. It was performed by Polly, a good friend of ours. She has a Ph.D. in Theology so even though she had never done this kind of thing before, she at least knew what she was up to. Anyway, I think our ceremony managed to convey the proper mixture of being solemn yet lively.


Opening Remarks

Polly:  

We are gathered here today to witness and celebrate the joining together in marriage of Elizabeth Honor Follmer and David Meyer Harman.

This wedding is a culmination of Liz and David's engagement, an affirmation of their devotedness to one another, and a celebration with family and friends to share their joy and happiness.


Remembering Loved Ones

Polly:  

David and Liz are overjoyed that so many of you could be here today and would like to thank you for making the journey to be here with us.

There are those close to David and Liz who could not be here today, but who would celebrate with us if they were here. Let us spare a moment for those who could not be with us today, but who remain close in our thoughts and memories.

First Reading

Polly:  

A wedding is a unique and special occasion, but this marriage is a union that lasts beyond today. While Liz and David's wedding will be one of the happiest moments of their lives, they also know that their love grew out of their daily lives, which has been enriched by the treasures of the smaller moments. And they look forward to daily affirming their union to let the joy that is here today endure.


Eric:  


This selection is from Euripides' play The Bacchae.

In various ways one man outraces another in the race for wealth and power
Ten thousand men possess ten thousand hopes
A few bear fruit in happiness; the others go awry
But he who garners day by day the good of life, he is happiest

Drink Wine

Polly:  

The two of you have shared many years together, and out of this time together has grown the love, which brings you to this day. As you continue to share each other's life, you will, as a symbol of this enduring cooperation, share this cup of wine. May you find life's joys doubly gladdened and its bitterness sweetened.

(Liz and David drink)

Second Reading

Polly:  

Marriage is the joining together of two people, but its foundation is weak if there is no love. Love is the most immeasurable of intangibles, yet it is one of our greatest strengths. And with love, a marriage can create a bond like no other.


Jim:  


This selection is a sonnet by Elizabeth Barrett Browning.

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
my soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
for the ends of Being and Ideal Grace.

I love thee to the level of everyday's
most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.

I love thee with the passion put to use
in my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose

With my lost saints-I love thee with the breath,
smiles, tears, of all my life!-and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.

Polly's Remarks

       

(At this point, Polly said what she personally had to say. Her remarks were never written down, but she did quote from the OED, and we both thought it was very cool that happened. Polly read out a definition of worship, pointed out that we didn't want the ceremony to reflect any worship, then asked us to worship each other. It was very well done.)

Exchange of Vows

Polly:  

Now it is time for Liz and David to exchange the vows they have written.


Liz:  


Nearly ten years ago I met you at the center of a circle of nine muses and since then you have become mine. I can imagine no other who could inspire me as purely as you have. I know your honesty every time I look into your eyes and with that I trust you and look forward to growing with you and knowing you as an old man.

I promise to hold you dearest in my heart, consider you in my decisions and support you in yours. I will love you for the rest of my days, and promise to surprise, amuse and comfort you on each of them.

I promise to hold you dearest in my heart, consider you in my decisions and support you in yours. I will love you for the rest of my days, and promise to surprise, amuse and comfort you on each of them.

In the tradition of two coming together out of love, to share a life I, Elizabeth, take you, David, to be my husband to the end of our lives.


David:  


We have been through many challenges since we first met and stayed up to watch the sun rise, and we have been drawn apart many times. Yet despite the missteps and misfortunes, here we are today, affirming our never ending love for each other. And I could not imagine myself declaring anything less.

I stand here today because anything less would leave me empty. You have nurtured me in good times, and you have steadied me when I have stumbled. I would not be half of what I am today without you.

I promise you the support you need as you follow your path. And I promise to comfort you and praise you when you struggle. I will love you and cherish you each and every day.

In the tradition of two coming together out of love, to share a life I, David, take you, Elizabeth, to be my wife to the end of our lives.

Exchange of Rings

Polly:  

In keeping with the declarations you have made, you give and you receive these rings. These rings are tokens of your union, symbols of enduring loyalty. The wedding rings are outward and visible symbols of your inner spiritual bond.


Liz:  


I offer this ring as a sign of my love for you, that I will always cherish you and honor you for all the days of my life.


David:  


I take this ring as a reminder of your constancy in my life, the fidelity of my love, and my loyalty to you.


David:  


I offer this ring as a sign of my love for you, that I will always cherish you and honor you for all the days of my life.


Liz:  


I take this ring as a reminder of your constancy in my life, the fidelity of my love, and my loyalty to you.

Pronouncement

Polly:  

By this sign you take each other, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer; in sickness and in health; to love and to cherish, till death do you part.

Because you, David Harman, and you, Elizabeth Follmer, have graced our hearts with expressions of your love, and promised each other the joy of all your days, it gives me great pleasure to now pronounce you husband and wife.

(Kiss)

Breaking of the Glass

Polly:  

There are quite a few explanations of the meaning of breaking a wine glass at this point in the ceremony. In the Jewish custom, it is a continuation of 5000 years of tradition and a reminder of history. To some it symbolizes the fragility of the union and the care that the newly wedded couple must take in nurturing it.

It is also a symbol of the irrevocability of the change they have made in their lives. David and Liz have all of these in mind, but now they would like you to think of it as the sound of a celebration just getting started.

(David breaks the wine glass)

Presentation

Polly:  

And with that, I am now pleased to present David Harman and Elizabeth Follmer.

(Retreat)